Savages

Blake Lively stars as Ophelia - the blonde girlfriend of two drug kingpins and best friends, Chon (Taylor Kitsch) and Ben (Aaron Johnson). Yes, describing her as blonde is the best adjective I can come up with for this bland, meaningless character, so just trust me on this one.

Ben is the brains behind the operation as he uses his skills to make the best and most potent pot in town, as well as building a distribution network and finding a money manager who can ensure their wealth is hidden properly (oh, and he is some sort of good doer who also builds water networks in Africa and such with his ill-gotten booty, so he's a "good guy" criminal mastermind, like when John Gotti used to help kids in the neighborhood or buy coffee for the FBI guys tailing him).

Chon is a war vet still suffering from what he saw in Afghanistan and Iraq, who serves as the muscle in the operation, as well as the founder of their best product.

While this polygamist relationship and partnership seems to be working out just fine, a powerful Mexican drug cartel wants to become the new partner, and only on their terms. When Chon and Ben refuse, king pin Elena (Salma Hayek), has Ophelia kidnapped and forces Ben and Chon to play ball.

When the two realize they have no other alternatives, can they come up with a plan to save Ophelia and get the cartel off their backs forever?

Savages is one of those movies that feels like it sprang loose from the Mountain Dew-induced fantasies of a 13-year old boy, which then spirals out of control toward an ending that induced laughter from the audience I saw it with. And, it wasn't that kind of laughter you hear when we are all in on the joke and appreciate the wit. It was the kind of laughter an audience lets loose when they realize the movie sucked and this ending proved it.

Sadly, writer/director Oliver Stone makes Savages into classy sludge, but sludge nonetheless. The entire movie is based on shock value and, supposedly, pushing the envelope and glamorizing the dirtiest parts of society, but it's not enough to keep the audience captivated.

At times, Stone delivers a good scene, especially anything with John Travolta (playing a DEA Agent who is part weasel and part genius, it is the best thing he has done since A Civil Action), but most of Savages devolves into campiness, especially Hayek, who gives new meaning to melodramatic and chewing-up-the-scenery as her character becomes some cross between a lonely mother and an angry Italian Godfather.

However, Savages mostly suffers from the lack of plot. Most of the movie is on some sort of autopilot, coasting along from violent scene to even more violent scene, until Stone and the writing team realize Chon and Ben ought to come up with a plan. Then, the twists and turns come fast and furious, too much after such an extended period of nothingness.

Plus, of all of the people to serve as narrator, why does it have to be the most boring and pointless character in the movie? It's safe to say Lively has never studied at the Morgan Freeman School of Narration. I guess she is supposed to be a drugged up lost soul, but a moment of lucidity and energy would be welcome.

Savages is rated R for strong brutal and grisly violence, some graphic sexuality, nudity, drug use and language throughout.